365 project: day 29

October 29, 2008

through the looking glass

October 29, 2008

i saw this on gelka’s blog so i am blatantly copying it from her. 

20 years ago…

  • i was a student in mrs. klein’s fifth-grade class.  
  • mrs. klein smelled of cigarettes and spoke like a 90 year old crone with emphysema 
  • we had a snake in our class.  it was black and yellow.  it repulsed and fascinated me at the same time.  one week i was in charge of bringing it a “pinkie” to eat; a pinkie is an itty-bitty-baby mouse.  i couldn’t do it.  
  • three friends and i did a choreographed dance routine to the song “dude looks like a lady” by aerosmith.  thinking back now, as an adult, i think there were perhaps some indecent moves in our routine, and certainly questionable content in our song.  i guess the talent show directors didn’t have a very high threshold for screening out inappropriate acts.  
  • i’m glad this happened in the days before youtube. 

15 years ago…

  • i was a sophomore in high school.  i was withdrawn and lonely because i knew that my family would be moving at the end of the school year.  i didn’t want to get close to anyone, or get involved in activities at school, because i knew that it would just make it harder to leave when the time came.  
  • i was looking forward to getting my driver’s license.  
  • my friend susie moved away at the beginning of sophomore year.  i still remember that she called me to say ‘goodbye’ as the plane was taxying down the runway.  we lost touch a few years after that.  i’ve searched for her google and facebook (creepy? or not so creepy?) but so far i haven’t found her.  i hope she is doing well.  
  • i was on the swimming team and water polo team at school.  i was decent at both, but a standout at neither.

10 years ago…

  • i’m a junior in college in a lovely, lovely place in southern california.  
  • i’m working part time at an eating disorder treatment facility.
  • i had broken up with my boyfriend of almost 4 years earlier that spring.  he called in october and told me that he had “hooked up with a rebound girl” (not an exact quote, but you get the gist). he is married to that rebound girl still to this day.  
  • i felt very lonely.  i didn’t really make an effort to make good friends, even though i was friendly with everyone and had a lot of casual friends and acquaintances.  

5 years ago…

  • living with a boyfriend, we’ll call him B.  our relationship was always much more platonic than it was romantic.  we were great friends, we were decent partners, but we certainly weren’t right for each other long term.
  • i was really into yoga and went to at least three classes a week, plus additional practice daily at home.  yoga had been a huge part of my relationship with B.  when our relationship started souring, and i moved out, i quit going to yoga class.  i probably needed it more at that point in my life, but i took a hiatus, i guess you could say.  
  • i started looking for my own apartment
  • i started my grad school internship, that would lead to my post-grad school career, which i would eventually leave to become a stay-at-home-mom

3 years ago…

  • miserable at my job.  it turned out to be a bad-fit for me and i cried almost everyday on my way into work.  
  • went to a wedding in st. louis (with my now-husband) and we got in the worst, most embarrassing, screaming fight.  it was not good. we came home to colorado after that trip, unsure of our relationship, unsure of our future.  he vowed to marry me before the end of the next year. 

1 year ago…

  • dealing with a colicky newborn
  • dealing with postpartum depression
  • mom flew out to help
  • there were joyous moment, but it was a tough time. 
  • sleep deprivation is torture

so far this year…

  • i’ve lost all my baby weight, and then some
  • i’ve started running again.  not often, but it feels good to get back on the trail
  • i’ve gotten my mental health under control
  • i’ve developed strong relationships with some amazing friends
  • i’ve been more consistent about getting back to yoga

goals for the rest of year and into next year…

  • be mindful and compassionate.
  • enjoy life, worry less
  • take pictures
  • do yoga
  • love my husband and my baby