p.s. today was indeed a better day

September 6, 2008

yesterday was one of those days.  it was gray and gloomy outside and i think that really took a toll on my mood.  my little girl, who is normally very sweet and mellow, has been a bit cranky for the past few days and i just hit my limit.  we are barely on the cusp of toddlerhood and she is already testing out her toddler-sized attitude.  she’s been whiny and fussy and hellbent on throwing all her food on the floor and putting none of it in her mouth.  she learned to climb the stairs and open the back door, she has discovered every flaw in my attempt to baby-proof the house.  i got to the point of needing a break; i just didn’t want to do it anymore.  i was suddenly just so tired of being “on” all the time and i wanted to go back to the days before i had a kid and before i had responsibility, and i just wanted to go to sleep and not have to do anything.  i wanted to drink heavily and watch crappy movies and have a good cry and forget about the load of diapers in the wash and the crust of blueberry-streaked goo smeared all over my hardwood floors.  i know that it is part of life and that all parents feel this way from time to time, but i hate that i jump to that ugly “woe is me, this is just too hard, i can’t do this anymore” mindset.  i know that this is just a phase and she won’t be fussy forever, but even if she were a constant crankball i know that i am strong enough to handle it.  i need to remember to enjoy the awesome moments (there are many), breathe through the tough times, and remind myself that tomorrow is another day.  


One Response to “p.s. today was indeed a better day”

  1. Ike Says:

    Wow, looks like somebody has been sculpting their guns.

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